Lucky, Lucky, Lucky Me

last night i know that i forgot to mention it here, but my daughter got a flyer in her backpack advertising this tutoring service and saying that they were offering free services for her school. (you know because of the no child left behind act). i thought that the name looked familiar but i wasnt sure, and i wanted my daughter to have tutoring so i called the number, and the lady was saying all about it, and that we needed to fill out a letter that my daughter would have gotten in the mail, so i said that we hadnt gotten one, and she was saying that we had to fill it out, and that people were saying that they hadnt gotten one and i wasnt the first one. then i happened to say did ---- (the one before this guy that i have been going out with now, the one with the living with his parents depending on his parents, dumped me and was really mean and insulting about it one) work for you, because i think that your name sounds familiar. she said that he did, but doesnt anymore, so i said good, because i wouldnt want him to tutor my child, so she said why, and i just said that we went out and didnt have a friendly break up. then she said that he wasnt with her anymore, because he had done something that was unethical, she didnt say what, and i wanted to ask her, but decided not to. she probably wouldnt have told me anyway. the end of the conversation was that she took my name and number and said that she would call me back later on that night (which she never did) to let me know about the letter that was supposedly already sent to us regarding the free tutoring. i havent decided if i am going to call her back regarding it or not, because my daughter does need tutoring in math and reading especially but i dont know if i want to get mixed up with her again, even if he doesnt work for her anymore.

then i woke up this morning, fully intending on going to work, but when i woke up i was having the most incredible intense stabbing pains in my lower stomach, and i couldnt hardly move, i was completely doubled over in pain, and couldnt bring myself to straighten up and have more pain. so i dropped my daugter off to school, hoping that it would ease up, and still wanting to go to work, but it still didnt, if anything i think that it got a little worse. it was so bad at one point that i was sweating. so finally i decided that i wasnt going to go to work today i just couldnt. so i called in and said that it was the car issue again, because the way that their policy works is that if you are out two days or more in a row for the same reason, then it only counts against you one time, instead of once for each day. so even though i missed work today, and lost another whole days worth of pay, at least it will only count against me once, which was the same one that i had no choice but to get yesterday because i would have been 10-15 minutes late to work if i had gone. so anyway, i went home and laid down from like 8:30am-10:30am in my bed which had my husband in it also sleeping because he was home with my son, becuase today is one of his days (mondays and wednesdays) that he stays home with him. so anyway, i woke up with him at 10:30am, and it was the pain was starting to feel better. then by like 11am it starting to really feel better, still there but at least i could deal with it. and as the day went on it started to get better, and better. my only guess is that it was my bladder issues that i have acting up because i am not taking my medicine for it anymore, because i cant afford them. so anyway, my husband took us out to lunch at denny's we had a nice lunch, then went home rested a little bit more, and then i took my son with me to go pick up my daughter. went to pick her up, went to the dollar store (with 5.00 that my husband gave me to spend), let them each pick out a toy that they wanted, got myself some nail polish and also got my dog a new squeaky toy. he looks so cute with it, it is a hamburger shaped designed toy. two pictures of him with it are below. so that was about it. me and my husband cooked dinner together tonight, so that was nice too. then a little while ago, he gave me some money to get myself a coolata drink at dunkin donuts, man do i love those drinks. so he has been really nice to me lately, especially today, and the other day. why is this? he also said that he would help me as much as he could with the money that i was going to be making myself short today too by staying home. he wasnt really happy about it, but he said that he would help. which was a good thing and a pretty big surprise too. he has been acting different, a lot better, maybe what he has been saying is true maybe he is trying to change and be different, he seems to really be putting forth an effort. i really hope so, for all of our sakes. cause things cant continue the way that they have been that is for sure. one thing that i did realize is that after all was said and done with all of the jerks who have hurt me and/or abandoned me over these 5 years that we have been married, he has always been there. he was also there to get me out of my daughters fathers house before we even got married. then he was there to give me for me and my kids to live in with hurricane came and that jackass never came back and left me. he was also still there when mr.dumper twice dumped me twice, and then he was also still there when the most recent dumper dumped me while saying just cruel and hurtful things. he has always been there for me, maybe that counts for something. when the going has gotten tough he hasnt left me like it seems like everyone else has. and what the hell is up with the past three guys dumping me, why couldnt i have dumped them first, geez. great for my self-esteem right.

well after how i wasnt feeling good this morning and didnt go to work today, that made up my mind for me that i wasnt going to be going over my friends house to see him and/or stay the night there. and i hadnt heard from him yesterday and all day today until 7pm when she called me tonight, asking me what i was up to. so i said nothing that i wasnt feeling well, and that my husband was home. she said that the guy didnt have anyone to pick him up at work again tonight, and that he was very upset about it and had been crying and was asking if i knew anyone. i said that i didnt know anyone, and that i hadnt been feeling well today. and that i hadnt been to work yesterday and today, and partly because i hadnt been feeling well for today, and partly because i would have been late to work yesterday because the alarm hadnt gone off that he had set. she didnt even comment on how i had said that i hadnt been feeling well, it was like either she didnt care, or something i dont know, she said that she didnt know that we had been late that he hadnt even said anything to her. so i said that i was surprised that he hadnt because i was pretty upset about it, and she said that no he didnt. and that was about it for that conversation, she said that she had to go because her battery was dying on her cell phone and she was still trying to find someone to pick him up from work and bring him back home. she said that hopefully her car should be fixed tomorrow, and she shouldnt have this problem anymore. so after tonight i wouldnt be able to see him again until next monday, because i am not going to bring the kids there anymore. i think this break is good, i need to figure some stuff out, he doesnt speak hardly any english, i speak hardly any spanish, my friend that he is staying with lives 30 miles from me, and i of course have to keep driving over there, because he doesnt have car. he doesnt even really have any money either, he does work, making like 7.00 an hour, and has no money saved so as soon as he gets paid it goes, and he actually just got this job a few days ago. even though my friend was saying that his family has lots and lots of money, it doesnt really effect him though because he refuses to let them help him and he does it all on his own. which is very good to hear, at least he isnt a momma or daddy's boy but still, he is also completely flat broke. and he is also only 22 years old. which compared to me and all the shit that i have been through, even thought that is only a 4 year difference it feels like an eternity. so anyway, now you see why i have a lot to think about. and now i have to go to work tomorrow, and i really hope that i dont have to hear anything about my not being there for the past two days, because that will really upset me, and the way that i have been lately, i dont know how i will deal with it. probably just burst into tears in front of everyone which wouldnt be good.

here are the pictures of my third baby with his new toy: