I Think I Need A Break

okay, so i went over his house last night. well actually my friends house, who he stays with. and i dont know, it was just a weird night. so anyway, i go over my friends house, and he was there of course. so we were there for a little while and we were sort of cuddling, and then he went his room, and laid down and i guess that he went to sleep. so then my friends husband (if you want to call him that) went in the room and said to him that he has a guest and that he shouldnt be sleeping. so he came back out, but then i got really frustrated because him and his cousin (my friends husband) were sitting there talking and laughing in spanish for at least a half hour and i was completely left out of the conversation. my friend of course wasnt out of the conversation because she understands and speaks spanish and english. so i got so frustrated that i went outside and went for a little walk and when i came back they had finally stopped it some. it was getting ridiculous. and then what was frustrating me even more is that my friend wasnt translating for me, or even saying anything to me about what they were talking about. so anyway. that was that. i know that i forgot to mention earlier that i believe that it was friday night we talked with my friend translating about my situation and everything else, because he wanted to know the details about how i was married, unhappy, sort of seperated that sort of thing. so i started at the beginning and finished at the end, so now he knows everything about what happened. so at least that did make me feel a little better about it, because now i know that i am not keeping anything from him. so anyway, we both went to "sleep", first we had sex of course, which is always so good, sooo soooo soooooo good. he is so skilled and well endowed it really makes for a good combination. okay you get my point. anyway,i turned my cell phone off because it kept beeping and annoying me, and i asked him to set his alarm for us. so he set it for 5:30am because i had to bring him to work too, and then come home get my kids, drop them off and then go to work. so anyway, i dont know what happened but all i know is that i slept really really really good and soundly, and didnt wake up once in the middle of the night like i usually do when i sleeping over there, and then next thing that i know i wake up and their is light streaming in the window. so i jumped up and looked at my phone when i turned it back on and it said that it was 6:30am, so got him up and we rushed out of the house. i was trying not to be really mad at him because i am sure that he didnt do it on purpose, but it still got me upset, because it really sucked for me. i dont know if he noticed that i was upset, or if he will just think that it was because i was really stressed out and rushing. got him to work, i came home in time to not make my husband late to work to get the kids from him, but by the time that i had dropped my daughter off at school and would have dropped my son off at my mothers, i would have been late to work. and my company has a dumb policy on how whether you are late by a few minutes, or you miss the whole day it counts against you the same way. so anyway, because of that i ended up just saying screw it and not going to work. because if it is going to count against me the same way, then why the heck am i going to go? the crappy part is that you are only allowed 4 of these in 6 months (they are so strict it is ridiculous i mean honestly what do they expect shit happens) before you get written up. and today was my third one in like a month and a half or so. oh well, guess we will just have to see what happens. i talked to my husband and he said that if i stayed home, cause i really wanted to get a lot of stuff done (i got a lot done, i did 5 loads of laundry, cleaned the house, scrubbed the kitchen, did the dishes, cooked dinner, registered my son for PREK), that he would help me out in like 2 weeks by giving me 50-60 dollars towards the bills, so that was good. i really hope that he does it, or i will be in a hole, but oh well, i am not going to worry about that now. now with the oversleeping thing alarm thing (which i am sure that he didnt do on purpose), then the me getting frustrated with not understanding what they were saying for a long time, and them talking literally right in front of me when they were doing that, and then with my friend constantly saying about not getting to attached men are dogs from that country and all of that stuff, and then also with my husband seeming to get his life a little more on track then before with him working two mostly full time jobs, and saying that he would help me and treating me better, i am thinking of taking a break. i havent really decided yet. what type of break, how long, or even if i want to do that. i just dont know anymore. i do know that my husband only has off monday and wednesday nights, and i saw him last night so the other night this week that i would be able to see him would be tomorrow night and that would be it for the week. so if i dont see him tomorrow night, then i would have to wait until the next monday night to have a babysitter, so it would be a week of him not seeing me. (and yesterday he was saying something about how i had abandoned him because he hadnt seen me in a few days, so imagine what he would say if it was a week). and i dont want to bring the kids over there again like i did on friday night, and stay the night with them or anything like that, because that was just too weird, and i was trying to hide the fact from them that me and him were in bed together (with clothes and everything but still, and then everything else) so that is a no, i dont want to do that again, the poor kids have been through enough drama. i dont want them to need therapy too. luckily i dont think on friday that they realized that he was in bed with me or that anything was up, because that havent mentioned anything to me, and i was being really careful about it but still. i dont want to do that again. honestly i dont feel like i want to go over there tomorrow night, so i dont think that i am going to. i just dont know anymore. i think i know why i feel like this, because of my husband and how he seems to be changing, then me getting frustrated with the language issue, the alarm me sleeping late and missing work thing, and also how my friend keeps telling me about being careful, geez, she is making me like paranoid too. this i think is all why i am thinking that i need a break from this, even if it is just a few days to a week. i havent decided yet what i am going to do about it though. if anything, i need to make a decision though.