Very Funny

very, very funny. i swear sometimes i really think that someone is really scewing with me in my life. and they are laughing at me when things happen. for example, remember that i didnt want to give him anything and that he only wanted it when he wanted it. well, i said to myself that i wasnt going to give it to him just because he wanted it. so anyway he wanted it last night, and i didnt give it to him. i gave him the excuse that i had that issue that i had, and that i didnt want to because of that. and normally i probably would have anyway, but i didnt. and i just gave him a little of something so he would stop bugging me. and he still whined a couple of times that he wanted it (like the whole thing) so i again used the excuse, and reminded him that about 2-3 weeks ago, and even a week ago i was ready and he wasnt. and now he was ready and i wasnt/couldnt. so i tried to make the point that it cant just revolve around his schedule. lets see if that point really sunk through his brain. the symtoms that i was saying that i had from that thing that i had have been slowly going away, not all better but thankfully a little bit better, so hopefully the way that it looks now i wont have to go the doctors for this, because i really dont want to deal with trying to take any time off work. my husband has been confusing me, i have been inactively cruising around testing the water a tiny bit online seeing what i could find. like for example i have been talking to this guy, not saying what profession that he is but he makes mad money, and he is older so would be more responsible. and he wants to meet after we have been talking for at least 6 months. sounds good right. just an innocent public meeting right? wrong. because he is married. so that is bad on that level alone, and he has kids. and so am i, and so do it. so i dont know. it is just leaving a bad taste in my mouth. i checked on HIS profile and myspace just to make sure that he was alive, because i was curious. and you want to know how long he has been sober since? july 5th, he claims that he hasnt had a drink since. so that would be why i havent heard from him since then. he sounds like he is really happy, good for him i guess. i wish that i was too. he is definetly alive too, by the way because the last time that he updated his myspace was today. oh well, i found out what i wanted to find out, i really dont want to know anymore right now. one thing i do want to think about and should keep reminding myself is that plenty of people have it worse then me. for example, one of my friends is pregnant already has a 2 year old and married the father just to marry him and she alternates between him living there and her kicking him out of the house. she ran out of gas yesterday and was stuck on the side of the road because she didnt have any money to put gas in her car. and it was her daughters birthday yesterday and she didnt have the money to even buy her daughter a cupcake never mind a present. so i guess that i should just try to remember that there are people worse off then me, and that i should be grateful for what i have.