Never A Dull Moment

well, i did go out with my friend last night like i was planning on, and i got my nose pierced. amazingly enough, it didnt hurt as much as it did when i had it done last year, and i didnt feel like i was going to pass out like i did last year. (i had my nose pierced about a year ago, but i had to take it out because it got infected because i wasnt able to clean it that well because i didnt have power because of the hurricane). so anyway, i got that repierced, same side and everything, and it looks good. i like it. here is a side view of my face with it:

cute right? then me and my friend went out for dinner, and we had a really nice time there, we were there for like about 2 hours just talking and spending time. that was good, we are definetly going to have to do that again.

so you would think that after that nice night, i would have had a good nights sleep. right? wrong. i had a very bad nights sleep, i kept waking up. and i had this dream. it just figures, in real life he has been leaving me alone for about 2 and a half months now, but now he has to mess with me in my head. or maybe i should say that my head is messing with me. because i had this incredibly vivid dream last night, where me and him were at this hotel room in disney world (which ironically enough is where he always said that he wanted to get married) and we were in the hotel room, thoroughly enjoying ourselves, and i commented about his size, and when we finished it was like i couldnt believe how good it was. i also remember that he was lying to his family and so was i, and that we had planned to have this time together, and i think the next day too. and then his brothers came out of the closet, which is even more interesting because one of his brothers i have never met, and it also happens to be his birthday today, and we were very embarassed. i dont really remember them being mad or yelling i just remember them being like yeah it figures, like they had thought that was what was happening. so that was just so upsetting to me, to have that dream, and all of that in it. because it just reminded me, once again, of what i dont have and will not have again with him. so the whole today i was pretty depressed about that, and being reminded of all of that.

then to make things even better, my doctor called me to tell me that one of the routine tests that i had done, he had gotten the results for and that they are abnormal. he said that he wanted to repeat the same test in 3-6 months to compare and see what is happening. so that is wonderful, because that test if it comes back abnormal and keeps coming back like means more testing, and then they would have to find out what is causing it to be like that, because what that tests for is cancer. so now i am paranoid, heck with the 3-6 months, i am going to be there in 3 months to see what is going on. and that is just great that will be right around christmastime. so there is one more thing to upset me and worry me to no end.