An Okay Day

well today wasnt like absoluetly wonderful, but it wasnt that bad either. i didnt get that great of a nights sleep last night because my son wasnt feeling good, and woke up at 1:30am, so even though my husband was already up, and could have taken care of him without bothering me, he had to bother me and keep asking me questions. so i didnt really have a sound sleep even though he was nice enough to take care of my son who wasnt feeling well. my son has been coughing, and saying a lot that he is achy, even though he doesnt have a fever everytime that i check him. so anyway, my husband gave him some medicine for the cough and the aches, and he finally went back to bed at like 3:30am. so then i woke up in the morning for work, and didnt feel that great, not only did i not have that good of a nights sleep, but also i woke up with a sore throat. then the sore throat seemed to go away, but was replaced by everytime i swallowing my ear hurting. which is a new symptom, which is just great. i had went to the doctor on monday, and she gave me an antibiotic which you take for three days, which i took for those three days, and it is supposed to stay in your system for a week and keep working. so now i dont know about this new symptom that i am having, which by the way as of right now i still have it and it hasnt went away. so okay, i went to work, which wasnt that bad. luckily there was enough work to keep me busy, and then when the work ran out i had other things and thoughts running through my head to keep me busy. then i was talking to another girl that i work with towards the end and we were so much into our conversation that we didnt even realize until the last second that it was time to leave and we could go. which was good, it was a lot better then sitting there and staring at the clock like i usually do. then we had a nice lunch at work too, as a treat for a certain celebration for us. it was really nice, we had lunch catered to us, and ate it outside like a picnic. and we got to be outside for an hour and fifteen minutes and only had to clock out for a half hour of it, which was really nice too. so even though i do complain about my job, they do some really nice things for us too at times. then i got off work, had to pick up the kids and do that whole thing. i dont know what my plans are for tomorrow night, or if i even have any plans. i cant go out with my friend from work that i usually go out with for out girls night, because she is having issues with finances which should hopefully resolve themselves so that she said we can probably go out next weekend, which is okay because we hadnt really discussed going out or anything this weekend it was more of a maybe, lets wait and see thing, so i am not really upset or disappointed about or anything. then this other friend who i havent talked to in a while started talking to me and we made arrangements for me to come over her house tomorrow night. so if that goes well then that will be really nice. i hope that it does, it will be something nice to do. and something different too. and i can hear in her voice that she isnt doing that well, she has so many things going on and is stressed out over everything. i want to go over there to try to talk with her too, and make her feel better. because i have been there before, and am still there sometimes, and i know how bad that it is to be that way.

My Nails

well i am very surprised by something that i just recently found out. i have been going to the same shop, to the same owner, for over a year to have my nails done every two weeks. and we had a really good relationship. friendship i even thought. i had my nails done there about three weeks ago, and i thought that everything was fine. then i called there to make my appointment yesterday like i usually do, and i was told that she wasnt there anymore. so i asked if the other owner was there anymore, which was her husband, and they said no that they had sold the shop about two weeks ago and moved to another city in florida which is several hours away. i was amazed that they would do this and not say anything to anyone, especially her say something to me, because i was a regular customer and would only have her do my nails. i even had her cell phone number, which by the way out of curiousity i called, but it was of course disconnected. i guess it just goes to show you, you think that you know someone and have a relationship with them, and look what happens. it just figures. i feel weird about this, like i deserved to be told and i guess offended that i didnt. it just goes to show you, how you feel about someone, doesnt mean that they feel the same way about you. how i really liked her and everything, doesnt mean that she thought of me the same way.

along those same lines, is the guys. i havent heard from any of them for quite a while now. i didnt hear from the jerk that stood me up twice since that last message that he had sent me on saturday saying yes, i'm sorry, and i answered that i guess i should be used to it by now. so i guess after that maybe he decided to give it a break for now, and forever who knows. i am not worried about it. i mean come on, you cant blame me for being upset, he stood me up two weekends in a row. ummm, hello. you see why i would be upset with you? anyway. and then there is of course the jerk that dumped me a little while ago after we were going out for two months. and with the dumbest reasons too. and not even the dumbest reasons, he was a jerk with what he said and how he said it too. i still cant believe that because i said that i didnt want to agree to being friends with him right then because of the way that he was treating me and what he was saying to me, that he was going to get mad at me. and rip me out of his life. i mean he actually removed me from his my space friends, and things like that, he is serious apparently about this ripping out of life thing, especially being that i havent heard from him since. which is fine with me, i just find it interesting that after he broke up with me, and acted and said what he said, he actually expected me to be friends with him, and got mad at me that i didnt. what a you-know-what.

surprise of surprises my husband actually kept to something that he had said that he was going to do, and got me my necklace back on monday night. he also gave it to me then, i just forgot to write it here. so at least he kept to one thing that he said. because if he didnt, i would have been beyond upset. so maybe he realized that who knows. but at least i have my necklace back. i of course dont have my 3 piece set of wedding rings, or the other jewelry that was in that box, but he claims that he had nothing to do with those being missing. which i dont believe. because i know where i put them, and they were there the last time i looked. so he must have had something to do with them being missing. but that is another argument i suppose. i have given those up as gone. i have given up hope of getting those back.

Boy Was I Wishful Thinking

i must have been wishful thinking yesterday when i was thinking that maybe it was an option to stay at home and give my kids (especially my daughter) the care and attention that they so desperately need. i figured some things out today, and with the bare minimum and that is without groceries, my credit card bills, and other minor things that take money, he would have to pay 750.00 more a month, up until a year from now April 2008 which is when my car would get paid off for, so then it would get dropped to 450.00 per month. but for another year it would be 750.00 per month more plus groceries, credit card bill, and other stuff...and that is of course plus what he already pays which is 1080.00. so for the next year that would total up to 1830.00 which is an insane amount for him to pay. not that i am saying that he couldnt do it, because he could if would manage his money and not blow it, but that doesnt happen. he is behind in his bills right now, which is basically our rent, he paid it late last month, and he is going to have to do that again this month, and so on until he finally catches up, which will hopefully happen soon with this night job that he is starting/has started. but anyway, when i figured all of the money and bills, and expenses out on paper, i dont really think that he can do it. therefore, i am not even going to mention it to him right now. because it is ridiculous to even consider it right now. it is just upsetting to me that i cant stay at home right now and take care of my kids, because they really need me right now, especially my daughter. work wasnt as horrible as i thought that it was going to be today, they had the meeting yesterday that i was talking about here yesterday. about how they dont know anything new about the merger, and that they shouldnt know anything until june. so i guess that we have to wait until them to know anything. which is just great, keeping everyone in suspense wanting to know what is going on. and they also mentioned about the emails and cell phones which i think is absurd. so what i did with my cell phone today was i still left it on my desk, but i put it under a few papers, that way people couldnt see it, but i could hear it if it vibrated. because i need to be able to see and hear my phone in case it is something important, for example an emergency for my kids. it was okay that my manager wasnt there yesterday and i left the message for her i guess, because no one said anything to me about that today. i know that i got a mark against me because of missing these past two days and i had another one from like 2 weeks ago, i just really dont care anymore.

The Bulls**t Update

well, i was home from work today and yesterday, because i was feeling really sick. had/have probably the same thing that my daughter had, with my head hurting, my throat, coughing, congested, a little ear pain, all of that great stuff. so i went to the doctor yesterday morning and was given an antibiotic, and also discussed with her two of medications that i have been taking. one of them is for my asthma, which its important to have so that i can breathe, and the other one is for my depression. the issues with the medications is that they are 60.00 each plus the other medications that i have to take too, so i cant afford them. they changed the prices on one of the medications, it wasnt that much money before. so that is what caused the issue. so for one of the medications the doctor said that if i had to switch it, to get the pharmacy to fax a request in for it, and she would fill it, and for the other one she gave me a months worth of samples, but after that who knows. then of course i wasnt at work today, so i am probably going to miss a lot of money out of my paycheck for this pay week. which luckily isnt the pay week that is coming up this friday, but still, it will just be the next one. i am talking to my friend that i work with right now, and she said that while i wasnt there they had a meeting about us getting bought over, and how they arent going to know anything until june. or something like that. and then she also said something that really upsets me, she said that during the meeting they said that we were only to use our email at work for business uses and no personal emails. and then they also said that we arent allowed to use our cell phones or i think even have them out where we can see them. so that is going to be great. i hope that i dont have an issue with them about that, because i always have my phone out where i can see it. because if i am at work, and something is wrong like with my kids, i need to see my phone and be aware of it. so that is probably going to be an issue i am sure, if they see my phone out. and then of course we have the rule that we arent allowed to converse with each other basically at all, heaven forbid we should be heard talking or we are standing up near our desks. so now with the no email and cell phones rule how are we supposed to talk, through sign language? and then there is another really great rule, that there cant be two people going to the bathroom or in the bathroom at the same time. so that means that if you have to go, and someone is already using the bathroom in our department with 6 other people in it, then you have to wait until they come back. i really feel like i am in elementary school, it is horrible. i have really been wishing even more and more every day it seems, that i had never transferred and i had just stayed with what i had, and just collected my severance package with staying with that position to the end. it of course is too late for all of that now, but still. i really am regretting making that decision now, as it seems from what i have heard and can tell, that a lot of other people are regretting their decisions too. so lets see what happens at work tomorrow, it should be interesting. i heard also that my manager, the one that i had left a message for this morning saying that i wasnt going to be able to come in today, wasnt at work today, so hopefully either someone got the message or it wont matter. whatever, i am so frustrated that i dont even really care anymore. i dont like waking up in the morning anymore, and i dread being at my job. thats not good. i talked to my "husband" about how for the kids best interest i would like to start staying home with them again, and take care of them, the house, etc. especially because of my daughter, her attitude is so bad, and it seems like she is always acting out, and her schoolwork has been failing too, i just dont know what to do. of course, to him that was a suggestion that he wasnt that happy with because he said that he was going to have to bust his butt to pay the bills, while i stayed at home, but he said something like we will see with my job and this transition thing, and other things that are happening. i know that he isnt going to go for it unless i push it, and then i am also scared that what happened before would happen again if i pushed him handling all the bills and everything himself, and we would get evicted again. but i really just feel that i need to be there for my kids, especially my daughter which seems to really need me right now, and with work and everything else, i am just not there like i feel that i should be.

Some More Pictures Of Orlando

Some Pictures Of Orlando

That Is It, That Does It

well, i am now done, that is it, i am so annoyed it isnt even funny. me and the guy had made plans tonight that we were supposed to be doing something. and we had set up this afternoon that we were supposed to be spending the night at this hotel that i knew about that was pretty inexpensive. and he had said that it was a plan, everything was good, blah, blah. i called the hotel, and the owner said that he would hold the room for me, and luckily i didnt give him my credit card number or any other information other then my name, because not even two minutes after i got off the phone with the hotel, he texted me and said never mind. and that was all that he said. so i texted him back and said never mind what. so he said something came up. so i answered and said so never mind to what everything, and he said yes, im sorry, so i answered i guess i should be used to it by now huh, and he didnt answer me back after that. so that whole thing was a complete waste of my time. i am pretty much done with him, this is the second weekend in a room that there was plans and he cancelled them on me. this was even worse then the last time, because last time we didnt actually have plans for what we were doing. this time we had plans and i even called the hotel and everything. so this time was way worse. bullshit. i swear i really cant stand men, that is why i really think that i am better off alone. i think that it is really better that way. or at least as alone as i can get with having a roommate as my so called husband, but he started a night job and is working at 3 nights a week, he just started doing that. so at least even if i dont go out at night once a week, at least i should at least have some nights to myself, after i put the kids to bed of course. i dont know, it looks like what i am looking for in a guy is incredibly hard to find. which you wouldnt think that it would be but who knows i guess. apparently it is. all i want is someone that will treat me good, he doesnt even have to be rich. i know that they say the first time you marry it should be for love, but the second time should be for money. but honestly, my second time is done already, and look how that ended up. i just want to have someone treat me good, and that seems like it is so hard to find. well, that it is for my ranting on that specific subject. i had to spent the morning and a little part of the afternoon with my daughters father, helping him with his finances and his documents and getting everything in order. while i was with him, we also went for breakfast, went to a store, and i also did two loads of laundry. and he also tried the very hardest that he could to get me into his bed with him and have sex with me. which i of course wasnt having and was very not interested but still. so that didnt happen, much to his disappointment of course. you would think that by now he would have given up, but no. at least the kids had a nice time. which is what matters the most. when we were leaving walmart, they had a fundraiser and they were face painting kids to help raise money. so her dad made a donation so that both of the kids could get their faces painted, so my daughter got a cat face, and my son got supermans logo on him, it looked cool. once i get the pictures developed i will have to put them on here of that. that was about it for today. so i am home now and have been since like 3pm just relaxing, not really that upset about the fact that i am home, because i am just enjoying the relaxation at this moment.

Lyrics From A Song That I Like

from "Settlin" by Sugarland

"Fifteen minutes left to throw me together,
for Mr. right now, not Mr. forever,
don't know why I even try when I know how it ends,
looking like another maybe we can be friends.
I've been leaving it up to fate,
its my life, so its mine to make.

I ain't settlin, for just getting by,
I've had enough so-so for the rest of my life,
tired of shooting to low,
so raise the bar high,
cause enough ain't enough this time,
I ain't settlin for anything less then everything.

So So Tempting

WARNING

I AM NOT FEELING LIKE THIS RIGHT NOW, I WROTE THIS A LITTLE WHILE AGO AND WANTED TO POST IT>>>>>>AGAIN THIS IS NOT HOW I AM FEELING NOW>>>>>

i just wanted to put this in here because i when i found it now and read it it sounds really good.

so so tempting, i want to do it so bad.
they say the medicine helps,
they can see a difference, i dont feel that much
of a difference, all i feel right now is an overwhelming temptation.
that temptation to feel the pain,
that feels so good, and hurts so bad.
this feeling that no one else understands.
they just say stop it, or dont do it,
like it is that simple.
like a magic wand can just be waved and then the
issues can just go away.
i wish that was how life worked,
that you could wave a wand,
and all your issues would go away.
but that doesnt happen.
so unfortunately,
you have to try to cope with the issues that you have,
and hope that things will get better.
but it seems that they never get better,
that there is always something coming up.
whether it is work related, health related,
relationship related, child related, or whatever it may be,
it sees like there is always something.
something that you have to try to cope with.
and no matter how hard you try,
it is a battle to keep it under control.
and then the feeling of alone,
when people reject you
and no one understands what you are going through.
why wont someone understand.

There Goes That Mother Of The Year Award-Again

i put my daughter to bed last night and about a half hour later she got up saying that her ear hurt. so i told her to go back to sleep, but then she started to cry saying that it really hurt. so i yelled at her to go back to sleep, and she kept crying saying that it really hurt. so i gave her tylenol then and told put her to bed and then she fell asleep. when she got up this morning and i asked her how she felt she said that her ear still hurt bad. so i asked my mom to gake her to the doctor instead of going to school today and she agreed. so the doctor saw her and said that she had a really bad ear infection and gave her some medicine for the cough that she had and for the ear infection. so now i feel bad because i brushed it off in the beginning and told her to lay down and get some sleep. and then i even yelled at her. i only did that because she is always a drama queen and she was acting fine before she laid down. i still feel bad about it though. and then i couldnt even be with her today, or take her to the doctor, i had to go to work instead. so i felt bad about that too.

some people at my job are going crazy, actually basically all of us are, because we had found out that we are getting bought over by another big company, and now we dont know what is going on with our jobs. so know no one knows what is going on, and everyone is flipping out. i am trying to not get to upset about it, because what i am trying to do is just keep reminding myself that no matter how much i worry about it and get upset about it, it is going to make any difference in what happens in the long run with it. so anyway.

i got the results today from the mri test that i had to have done on my knee and ankle, only for the moron doctor to tell me that i had swelling in my knee and that my ankle looked like it was strained, but that there was nothing wrong with me and nothing further that could be done, and then he made a comment like i might have to live with it like this, so i said i am in pain i have to live like this for the rest of my life? and he didnt answer me. just discharged me from his care, and gave me a 0% disability, basically saying that there was nothing wrong with me. so i got aggravated got the mri results, ordered my medical records, and also got the number to my caseworker, and i dont know what i am going to do from here. i know that i am in pain, and that is not normal, especially being that it has been over 2 months. so i dont know, it upsets me.

the guy that i was supposed to hook up with last weekend (the one that dumped me twice) instant messaged me a few times yesterday, saying that he had been thinking about me. and of course just basically making it sound like he wanted to screw and that was it. which was what he had been saying all along this time, but still. it would be nice if it was a little something else to, but no. anyway, he was saying that he didnt know if he was going to have the money for a hotel, but that we could still hook up somewhere in like a dark corner or something like that, give me a break, that is so not what i am looking for. then he said that he should know if he has the money for it by tonight, and that he would let me know. then after that he said be right back, and signed off, and then he still wasnt back on for like 10 minutes, so i went to bed, and signed off and that was it, i havent heard from him since. i dont really care right now anyway though, because with everything that i have going on, and especially that he just wants to do that, and nothing else even if it is in like a dark corner or something, give me a break, i dont even think that i am interested right now.

Rantings and Whinings

i havent had my nails done since the 5th. i broke one of them the beginning of last week, and i havent even cared enough to get it fixed or to get them done like i should have this week. i had a conference with my daughters teacher today, and didnt get that good of news which i didnt think that i would. she needs to practice reading everyday. she is going down and went down in her reading levels, and she doesnt seem to be applying herself anymore like she used to or even trying. the teacher said that in her opinion she doesnt seem to have add but she doesnt focus, she is always busy trying to see what else is going on. she also doesnt do well in math. how am i going to find the time to go over her reading with her everyday. i get home at 6:30pm, and they go to bed at 8pm. and then i usually have to fix dinner, they have to eat dinner, and get ready for bed. it is hard for me to even squeeze 15 minutes of time into there. she also needs to practice her handwriting, because it is bad and her numbers and some of her letters are backwards. she also needs help with math too. how can i do all of this with her. i feel like such a failure as a mother. i cant do it all. i wish that i didnt have to work and could just stay home and take care of the kids, and the house but that just isnt possible. especially with the way that things are. so what can i do? just do the best that i can? and then because of how she took the test in march, and just bubbled in anything, without paying attention, there seems to be a chance that she might not pass to the next grade. the teacher said that she wouldnt hold her back, and that if they wanted to she would try to fight it but still. i am so upset about so much right now, it is just so frustrating.

My Son's New Haircut

i came home from work, and he had this haircut. which is what i had been telling his dad that i wanted him to have but i didnt know that he was going to do it today, they surprised me with this when i got home. here is the before:



and here is the after:







isn't he cute? i like it, but it took some getting used to in the beginning, he just looks so grown up to me it is amazing now with this haircut. but i guess that this haircut is perfect timing with his birthday coming up soon too. his birthday is on may 1st and he is going to be four years old.

A Thought

Is it really that easy to just rip someone out of your life? Can you really just do it, and never think about that person again? Never have a thought enter your head about them? Never have a memory pop into your brain because of a certain smell or taste? Or a certain place that you went to with them? Or a certain feeling that they gave you? Can you just wipe them out of all existence? No of course you can't. No matter how hard that you try, there will always be something to remind you of them. Unfortunately.

More Crap

well more and more things to think about for me now. i found out yesterday that my company was bought out by another huge company that does basically the same similiar thing, but they are of course a big company, and compared to them we are a little fish. the buy out was effective immediately and within the next few months i guess that we will be seeing some changes is the way that it was made to sound. they were also making it sound like they didnt know anything about it, but yeah okay, i dont know if i believe that one. so know everyone is flipping out about it, because the company was bought out a few years ago, and that time they let go of almost everyone that was with the company. the good thing, if it happened this time too, is that they said that everyone got severance packages, so i guess at least that would hopefully be something to get you back on your feet. and hopefully it would be enough money and time. my company is also being pains in the butts right now, i asked to leave two hours early for my daughters appt at the dentist to have her last cavity filled and they wouldnt approve it right now because they said that i dont have enough time off for it, and that they would have to wait and see if i had enough before they were able to approve it. but yet my medical they will approve, but i suppose that is because it is something different. i think that it is ridiculous though because i dont care if i dont get paid for it thats fine, i just need to take her. so why cant they just approve me and then if i dont get paid for it oh well. and then of course there is that more then one person cant go to the bathroom at the same time, we have to wait til the other one goes and comes back to go. and then there is the latest thing that we arent allowed to eat at our desks anymore, and also that we are not allowed to fix food or anything during our working hours too. it is getting more and more harsh, i cant believe the amount of rules that are going on now. on another subject, my "husband" started another job tonight, his second job which he will be working at night, so hopefully this lasts. he is supposed to be working there three nights a week, as of now, unless him or they want him to work more and he can. he is supposedly getting my necklace out next monday, because that is when he is getting paid, which he better do, or i will be incredibly upset with him. and he also sent me a text today on my phone while i was at work saying that he started his goal today, that he was keeping to his word. so lets really hope that he does, and that this time is different then the others. i havent heard from the last jerk, i still cant get over that after all that he said and the way that he acted that he still expected me to be friends with him, and then he got mad at me and said that he was ripping me out of his life then. i cant get over his nerve. what a child. he really needs to grow up, i think all those years of living with his parents since he was born have done him no good whatsoever. except of course to make him spoiled. i havent heard from the other one either, the one that cancelled on me at like the last minute, and then i havent heard from him since. he had messaged me that night while i was signing off, so i didnt answer him and instead i texted him the next day, and he didnt answer so whatever. i am not going to be the one to contact him that is for sure. if he wants to contact me he can make the first move now, i forgot how undependable and frustrating that he is. on a flattering more happier side, i went to my friends house on sunday night, we had our hair dyeing party, had dinner, etc. and it was fun, we both had a good time, the even more interesting thing was that her 17 year old stepson who i have never met before, made a comment about how nice my hair was and how he liked girls with long hair, and i could tell he was really liking me. she said that when i left he said that i was really nice looking. so apparently he thought that i was hot. hehehe. i mean he is young, jail bait even, and i wouldnt even consider it unless he was 18. and even still he is too young for me, and he is my really good friends stepson which would just be really weird, so i would never even consider it, but at least it is nice to know that i can even get younger guys attention and they can think that i am hot. i guess that sort of is something to be happy about. maybe i still have it who knows.

From An Email Forwarded To Me

"As we grow up, we learn that even the one person that
wasn't supposed to ever let you down probably will. You
will have your heart broken probably more than once and
it's harder every time. You'll break hearts too, so
remember how it felt when yours was broken. You'll fight
with your best friend. You'll blame a new love for things
an old one did. You'll cry because time is passing too fast,
and you'll eventually lose someone you love. So take too
many pictures, laugh too much, and love like you've never
been hurt because every sixty seconds you spend upset
is a minute of happiness you'll never get back. Don't be
afraid that your life will end, be afraid that it will never
begin."

"Live simply. Love generously.
Care deeply. Speak kindly."


I really like these thoughts.

It Figures Even More

i had plans with my friend this weekend like i had said, to go out last night, and to dye each others hair and spend a little time together tonight. but last night we didnt end up going out. i didnt hear from her about it until like 5pm yesterday and we were planning on meeting at 8pm, and she said that she hadnt realized that she had something to do for her husband and that she wouldnt be able to make it. so we ended up not going, and it sucked even more that she waited that long to tell me because i was looking forward to it all day, and also i was even halfway dressed and everything else. so it just sucked and i was very disappointed last night. especially since the other guy had cancelled on me for friday night, at almost the last minute as well, i was supposed to be leaving at 8pm and he had cancelled on me at like 7pm. then that night when i was getting ready to sign off my messenger, he messaged me saying that he was sorry, blah, blah, so i ignored it because i was tired and getting ready to sign off. so the next day, i texted him saying that i was sorry that i didnt get his message but i must have been signing off at the same time that he was messaging me, and he didnt answer me then or since. so whatever. i dont really care as much as you would think anymore, because him doing this reminded me that he used to do this a lot to me, break dates and things that he said to me. and then of course there is the great way that he dumped me twice, that is even better to remember. my husband has been walking basically on eggshells with me, i guess because he knows that the slightest thing that he does to me, is going to make me loss it with him. if i had the money to do it by myself i would have kicked his ass out the moment that i figured out that he had pawned my necklace. which by the way now seems to be my necklace and my three piece set of gold wedding bands, because they are also missing from the box that i kept that necklace in. even though he claims that he had nothing to do with them being missing, i of course dont believe him, i know where i had put them and they arent there anymore, that whole box is empty. so he has to be the one responsible for that. he said to me yesterday, because i guess that he felt really bad, that he is going to be getting my necklace back out of there, and that if he had lost my wedding bands that he would have to replace them, so that wasnt him admitting that he did it but that was pretty close. what he said that meant something to me, sort of anyway, because i dont really believe much of what he says because he never follows through on it, but anyway he said that he realized how messed up what he did was and that he was going to do better now and quit all of the stuff that he was doing that wasnt good for him. so lets see, so far today there hasnt been any change in him or what he is doing, he is still his same self so far. so lets see what happens. i really hope that he gets better, i want what is best for him. even if in the end me and him dont stay together, which i am sure that is what will happen, eventually when i can that will be it we will be done, i still want him to be okay and do good for his son, because i want him to still see his son, and i also want him to do good for his son. but i am so used to him saying things and not following through on them that who knows what will happen. i have to finish this now, because i am going over my friends house to dye our hair and be there for a little while. unless that gets cancelled on me too, or something happens, but i guess on the up side at least i got some relaxation this weekend, which is something that i didnt get last weekend in orlando/kissimmee that is for sure.

More Pictures--From March 31st and Disney Vacation

Some Pictures From The Disney Vacation